I Chose Me, I Chose Happiness.
When you stop feeling like you fit into your old life, sometimes you have to make the brave decision of falling completely out of that life. That’s exactly what happened to me. My second time around where I began traveling again, I had just gotten back from spending a month in Thailand. One too many times I would catch myself looking around at my surroundings and would just become enveloped with feelings of sadness. as if my potential, what I really wanted was no longer in this life, this little box I had built. So I began to think what it was that needed to change and after way too many times catching myself staring around in disdain, I began to shed all the layers of my surroundings away. I first ended an 11-year relationship. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do, but in the end I had realized we were just two pieces of two very different puzzles. Next part, I decided whether where I lived was where I belonged. What was it that I wanted in my hometown? I have lived here for the majority of my life. Explored its walls. Learned in its institutions. Found love. Lost love. It came to a point where this place became more and more confining by the day. So when I got an acceptance letter to the graduate program at San Francisco State University, I felt another anchor being launched at me, hoping to ground me to this place. There I was, just sitting and staring at this letter, this anchor. I allowed myself to become fully aware of the pain I felt of a breakup, living in a confined space and tried to envision myself living this way for an additional two years. It only took a minute before I made my decision. I ripped that letter up.
I chose happiness.
I chose adventure.
I chose me.
I decided in that moment, I would travel the World for a year. Yes, I was scared. Nervous. Hell, even doubtful. But I knew this had to happen. I had found my answer.